Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
