she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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