New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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