My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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