He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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