Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
