I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
