Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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