whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Randomize
