grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
