Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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