Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
