do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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