rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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