when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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