we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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