I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
