Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
