That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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