oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
