yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Alive.
So much puke
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
