the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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