some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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