oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
so much tequila, so little girl.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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