And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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