hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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