You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
