I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
