also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
