I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
