doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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