in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
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