Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
It's shark week go big or go home
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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