I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
