I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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