I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
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