Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
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