therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
