i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
its not stalking. its research.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
