I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
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