Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize