i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
