I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Randomize
