we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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