i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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