Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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