I feel like I'm in dance class right now
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
