I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
