A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
i've created a new STD.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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