i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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