I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
love makes seman taste better
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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